Genuine care for community, genuine respect for another human being, and genuine interest in creating happiness in today’s world rarely supersedes one’s own desires and needs. After all, we are living in the era of individuality and human independence. Natural evolution and socio-economic changes are driving this movement. Much of it is good: greater innovation and entrepreneurialism, greater freedom, a stronger push for individual rights, an opening of opportunity to all walks of life, and so on. However, the negative side of this movement is that selfishness is a natural result and thus the basic acts that show caring and create bonds of true togetherness lessen or are wiped out entirely.
There are some basic behaviors that illustrate the point that basic acts of genuine human connection and caring are fading. Probably the most noticeable example is phone behavior. Most people generally prefer texting over speaking (see Forbes article here). Sure, costs have precipitated this, but also the fact that texting avoids real contact and shelters you from emotions that can be transmitted via a voice. In a nutshell, you are protected by a screen and characters on a white background. Then there is the ubiquity of not responding to calls, texts, and so on. Most of us seem to think that this behavior is not only acceptable but expected. However, it only reinforces the message that no one is more important than “me” and everyone else is replaceable. Is this what we want to teach our kids?
Another manifestation of weakening togetherness and caring are the disappearance of the family meal. This used to be a staple of family living. It helped you connect with your parents, your parents with you, and it allowed healthy conversation and curiosity to energize the family. We need only look at films of today compared to those of the 20 or more years ago to notice the difference in acceptable family dining. Too often in films today you’ll see parents rushing off to work or people coming home late. A few decades ago these scenes were very different. They were given much greater emphasis and appreciation. Family should precede the individual, and a meal together is the ultimate daily reinforcement of this. By watering it down, or removing it, we are suggesting that individual needs are more important.
I would even argue that social media behavior suggests a fading of genuine human connection and caring. Sure, we are able to connect with people that we have not seen in a while or be in regular contact with those close to us, but through what kind of content? Looking at most posts of others, and even myself if I’m honest, the general tendency is to celebrate your own discoveries, your own travels, and your own good times. In short, social media is your public relations platform. You are putting your best self forward and merchandizing content that demonstrates how cool or traveled you are versus having honest displays of who you are, which is fundamental to the creation of genuine human connection. Moreover, the interaction with others on social media is more about “keeping up with the Joneses” than showing appreciation for another. Even your “likes” or “comments” are more about demonstrating your coolness, knowledge, or “being part of the dialogue” rather than about sharing an honest and one-to-one (i.e. No fame benefit) moment with a friend or acquaintance.
I would argue that a major driver of the negative aspects of individuality and independence is the break-down of the world economy, and its ripple effects on how businesses operate in the world today. Not only is employment difficult to come by, but once you are employed you can expect little to no loyalty from your employer. The pressure to stay competitive is so strong that corporations frequently have to make drastic moves that affect its people to sustain shareholder value, company cash-flow, and even company life-support. As a result, people have been learning to only trust themselves. Not only do they know that their employer can drop them at any time, most of their colleagues are in a state of “constant political awareness” in order to best shield themselves from the erratic company tides. Students and young professionals are taking even more drastic measures by not bothering to enter the traditional workforce, opting instead for entrepreneurial undertakings. This clearly requires a big hustle and a lot of “me” versus “we”.
The days of where caring for your company and colleagues anchored corporate cultures are mostly gone. Fortunately, there are signs that we may be reaching a tipping point where acceptance in the status quo is no longer acceptable. Balance is much more desired (read Inc.com article here). Millennials are seeing the impact of this negative corporate world on their parents and do not want to live this reality. Therefore, they are making moves to create change. Many are starting their own companies, and others are looking to join companies that have great work cultures that are purpose driven and nurture healthy human values. The interest in big corporations is changing from previous generations.
The working world is truly “work, in progress“. Unless companies start to make changes, they will lose the ability to attract great talent and will lose the ability to be desired by consumers. The future is certainly going to be interesting.